Tonya Harding, Oregon's reigning queen of trailer trash, has announced that she will be participating in a professional wrestling match with a transvestite. This, of course, is entirely in character for Tonya, but this is NOT the "most amazing" thing I want to share with you.

In honor of that announcement, "The Edge," which is the daily humor section of the Oregonian, is having a contest where people can submit up to 3 Tonya-related limericks. I found it difficult to stop at only three.

Before I submitted my limericks, I wanted to check the spelling of her name, just so I made no mistakes. In Googling her, I came across Tonya's own personal web site, www.tonyaharding.com.

The web site includes a couple of nice photos, but there are two things on there that I find most amazing. First, she actually claims to be "the most influential person in Figure Skating", AND the second most influential person "in all sports history, second only to Mohammed Ali".

Can you imagine THINKING such a thing, much less posting it on a public web site? I'm completely agog.

Adding to the fun, later on there is a quote from an Oregonian interview in which she outlines her lofty goals for her life. She wants to make enough money from boxing, she says, to "go hunting and fishing, and every once in a while put on a really pretty dress and go to dinner at a place like Applebee's or something."

Now, wouldn't you think that the second most influential person in all sports history would be able to aim a little higher than Applebee's?

I want to feel sorry for Tonya, really I do. But every time the flame of publicity is just about to flicker out, she herself dumps another gallon of kerosene on it.